Insanity Growing From Staying In All Week

I have had lots of jobs over the course of my adulthood. The only advantage to having had many, many, many jobs is the education you receive about human nature (and the realization of how many idiots walk the planet). I worked for one company whose secretary began every sentence with, "I was going to say..." I thought that was quite annoying. Later, I had a boss (at another company) who began all of her sentences with, "I started to say..." Since she hired me, and consequently could have fired me, I held my tongue. Here is what I would have said in a perfect world:

She: I started to say, we need to order some more file folders.
Me: When?
She: When? Right now.
Me: No, when did you start to say that?
She: Say what?
Me: That we need to order some more file folders.
She: I just said it.
Me: Yes, I know. I heard you. However, you said, at the beginning of the sentence, that you started to say we need to order some more file folders. So, what I'm asking is, when did you start to say it and not say it?
She: I have no idea what you're talking about.
Me: I didn't think so.

Of course, in reality, my next action would have been to drive to the employment agency and apply for unemployment, so that is why I held my tongue. I've been holding that tongue for years.

Here's another one from BLAKE:

Three couples were spending time at a restaurant for their anniversary.

The man of the couple married for 10 years looks at his wife and says pass the sugar, sugar.

The man of the couple married for 25 years looks at his wife and says pass the honey, honey.

The man of the couple married for 50 years looks at his wife and says pass the tea, bag.

Thanks, Blake, keep 'em coming.

It's a beautiful day, so I think I'll actually get dressed and take Abby outside for a while. I'm getting cabin fever and need to get out. Have a good day, everyone, and I'll talk to you later!

Love,
Vanessa