Sunday, April 09, 2006

Here She Goes, Again

A major pity party has been going on in my house for several weeks now. I’ve written about my depression a time or two, so you know about it, but what I’ve not mentioned lately is that I am now off the meds. There’s no longer a milligram of a milligram of antidepressant in my body. Why would I go off the meds? I have my reasons. Those of you who are hounding me to take them, please find some other cause to devote your nagging to, because I’m sticking with my decision. The fact that I know why I’m so messed up right now is some consolation. Years ago, before therapy and drugs, I had no idea what was wrong with me. That was misery. This is just not a happy time, but not pure misery, since I’m aware of the problem and I’m also aware that I’m doing what I’m doing for a reason.

So, that’s why my blogging has suffered as of late, and why I might not be a regular blogger for a while. My brain is in a transition and I’m going to be “phoning it in” for a while. I'm also going to be writing a lot of awful poetry. I’m optimistic, however, that I’m going to get through this with a lot of insight which will help me deal with my dark side much better in the future. My very, very bright future.

8 comments:

Kisses in Quarantine said...

I hereby promise not to nag. I look forward to the awful poetry... will it be worse than mine? Take care.

KiQ

Crazy MomCat said...

No nagging here either! I think a person has to do what feels best and what works for them, and everyone is different with things like this. Just take care of you--that's what is most important!

Elaine said...

Hey, this is the hippie mom, remember? I all for finding a way to live without the aid of drugs. Hell, I'm even annoyed about the herbs I take due to the whole Baby Blues thing. So take care of yourself and take it easy and check in when you can! We'll be thinking of you!

Julie said...

I'm cheering you on from the sidelines. Here's to your bright, bright future.

I hope you don't have too tough a time working your way through it all. And for any tough times, I agree that bad poetry can be very therapeutic.

Irene said...

I'll keep you in my prayers Vanessa. I trust you. I know you will get through this. and yes, your future is very, very bright.

(((hugs)))

Anonymous said...

I PROMISE TO NAG TENFOLD SO THE REST OF YOU CAN BE SWEET & ENCOURAGING.
AUNTIE L

Kisses in Quarantine said...

Blimey, that Auntie L sounds a bit scary.

Miz S said...

You may remember that I tried to go off Effexor recently. My anxiety spiked immediately, and I remembered why I went on it in the first place.

You gotta do what you gotta do, whether it's taking the pills or not taking the pills. It sounds like you are really motivated to be unmedicated, so go for it. Email me anytime if you want to talk about it.